Your Wedding Coach

 About Mari Sullivan

Mari is a qualified Life Coach in private practice and a member of the Life and Business Coaching Association Ireland (LBCAI) You can find more information on her website

www.westcorklifecoach.com

De-Stress Your Wedding Day

Planning your wedding is a joyful time, however from my own personal experience I know that it can feel stressful. The best way to reduce the stress is to get organised and have a clear plan of  action. I hope that these few ideas will set you on the right track.

To get the ball rolling the first step is to have a brainstorming session with your partner. By sitting down together, with pen and paper, you can make short work of ensuring that both of  you have the day that you want.

The ultimate goal of this session will be to define a cohesive vision, develop a theme and feel of your wedding and get a general idea of the budget. This  will help you get over the initial hump of starting to plan .

Its easy to get carried away and forget that there are two of you involved  (see the film’ Sex and the City’ for a good example of the madness taking over!)  This is also a good time to flag up any worries you might have around the day, ie. family issues.

Marriage is a partnership and planning your day together is a great way to start working  as a team. Making a commitment to discuss the wedding at regular intervals will also keep you on track.

A Few Wedding Stress Reduction Tips

1.         Try to resolve or pre-empt family issues well ahead. If you know that Aunt Eileen always gets drunk and makes a scene, have a plan to get her taken home early. Place non-speaking parties far away from each other etc If there are unacknowledged stresses in any of your relationships than be warned, the wedding will probably bring these to the fore so PREPARE and have an action plan.

2.         If you are a control freak, now is the time to start letting go.

YOU can’t do everything, DELEGATE to trusted family, bridesmaids and friends. Trust your instincts, if you adore a certain friend but know that she is flakey , this is not the time to think she will change!

3.          Identify  your coping strategy. If something doesn’t go quite to plan, do you panic, cry, shout – (none of this looks good in a wedding dress!) There are lots of ways  to help keep you calm. Regular exercise, yoga or breathing meditations are invaluable.

4          Set realistic goals, particularly around weight and health issues. Remember you are  marrying each other as you are now. You want to look great in the photos but you want to look like you. So don’t make yourselves miserable in the lead up to the wedding by setting unachievable goals. Any significant changes should be seen as a long term aim with the wedding as your catalyst.

5.         Don’t overstretch yourself financially. Set a budget and stick to it. Realise that no-one is really going to be offended if  you only have a small wedding or a wedding abroad. If they are offended it says more about them than you and they will get over it.

6.          Accept that you can’t please everyone and you and your partner are the priority. 

 I have by no means addressed all the issues that arise when planning a wedding but I hope that you will contact me if you would like me to write about specific issues. A Coach is a great support particularly in areas of self confidence, planning, stress management and realistic goal setting.